From the mouths of babes...comes humility...*sigh*

Why is it that a child can humble you quicker than lickity split? My daughter was using one of my phrases this week, only with a different tone of voice and it sounded very belittling. Guess I'll be looking for a new phrase. Dang, this whole humility thing can be a bit painful at times.

One of Many of Life's lessons

This week I was talking with a friend of mine. In our conversation I expressed how I enjoy having friends over, and how I was feeling bad because I felt like some friends weren't reciprocating the way I thought they ought to. She then shared with me how she and her husband are more home bodies, they aren't very social.

After our conversation and on my way home I began thinking. I would have never guessed that she and her husband were home bodies. They have had us over, and they are always having my son over to play with their son. Then I began to think about the other friends I have had over at times. They have been there for me and my family in many situations, maybe that is their way of showing their gratitude or appreciation of our friendship.

Maybe there are others in our circle who don't feel social as well. These people enjoy visiting with others when they are invited but may feel like it is out of their comfort zone to do something simular for one reason or another. It could be like this friend of mine, they simply enjoy being home with family and aren't thinking about who they should have over this up coming weekend.

Then I began to think a little deeper about how this friend seems to have a good time when she comes over. I know I appreciate it when she has my son over. I appreciate my friends who are there to help me in a moments notice or who just listen to me chat their ear off. So there are many ways friends of mine have reciprocated and I just have been unacknowledging.

This whole thing has brought a different perspective on why we are so different and how each of us has something to contribute. I am hoping my friends have enjoyed our get togethers. Because I am beginning to appreciate more the attributes they bring to our circle of friendship, if everyone was like me think of how tiring it would be to get together all of the time. Think of how much this world would be missing, especially in the areas I am lacking.

I am thankful for the patience others have for me as I learn these life lessons.

A Lesson From Life

A lesson and/or thought keeps coming back to me. I thought I would take a moment to share it.

Have you ever found yourself looking at another and wondering why they do things the way they do? What is their motive? or simply, what are they thinking? Now, have you stopped to think that they may look at you with the same questions?

On with my thought. I believe that everyone whether intentionally or not is striving for perfection. In one shape of the word or another. Now bare with me, I know, there are those with "white trash yards"(been there) maybe the always seem frazzled(there too) maybe their shirt is wrinkled(who has that not happened to?) Or they have a sink full of dishes, toys all over their house. Some things we notice may be trivial, others we may feel are life and death. Maybe none have noticed these things. In that case, this blog is not for you, others are thankful for your lack of sight.

Okay, now I have you thinking, you might even be thinking of someone in particular. I am finding at different seasons in my life that I am beginning to understand more and more how these things can happen. But this isn't where I wanted to go, so I will move on.

We all will agree we are striving for perfection right? So what is perfection? For one it may be an immaculate house. For another, happy creative children. Some may want vast amounts of knowledge, while others are wanting to experience it all. Some want the know how, others to teach. There are so many of us out there, it would take me forever to list us all. However, I think you have the idea. Moving on.

Everyone has their own idea of what the perfection is they are trying to reach. I am finding though that there is someone out there who knows better than ourselves, not only what our potential is but how we can obtain even a greater perfection than we can see for our selves. That is our Heavenly Father.

The right is ours to work on perfection for ourselves single handedly, but how realistic is that? With out experiencing life, how can we walk in others shoes, how can we grow to our potential? With out Heavenly Fathers assistance, how can we endure those cruel times (that we can sometimes look back on and laugh at)? With out the Savior how would we be able pick ourselves up after a great fall, brush ourselves off, and return to the race we signed up for long before we can recall?

I find more each day how perfect God's plan is. Not only is it tailored to us as individuals, It is also tailored to us as individuals. I am finding again and again how Heavenly Father knows me better than I do. Not only that, but he really does have our happiness at heart. If this is honestly the case, He definitely knows you just as well. Then comes the difficult part, I have to remind myself "who am I to judge? I don't know what has brought that brother/sister to this point. Nor do I know what Heavenly Father has in store for either of us."

When I have this thought, instead of judging I try to see what I can do to help, and if the help is not wanted, I trust they are putting it in bigger hands than my own and hope that the same would be done if someone is looking my way. By the way, Heavenly Father has blessed me with plenty of hands having been stretched my direction, and I hope I show the appreciation I feel to each of them.

One Day at a Time

My husband posted a blog yesterday about taking life one day at a time. I would like to reiterate what he said.

There are so many people taking life one day at a time. In reality I think sometimes that is the only way we can make it through those bumpy roads we all have to travel. But like he said, we need to look a little further down the road.

He used the example of teaching our 15 year-old to drive. He was swervy-tervy in his driving because he was looking directly in front of him rather than down the road to his destination (it could make one quite sick). However once he began looking further down the road his driving improved incredibly!

I think we need to have some goals set for ourselves. What is it we want out of life? Out of this experience? Out of this education? Once we have decided what we want, it makes life easier to take a day at a time. We have a destination to obtain!

Valued Lesson

Today I was talking with my teenager. He is going to be a famous author someday. We were talking about the importance of backing things up and saving them in more than one place. In this conversation I used myself and his mother as examples. Through my personal example I mentioned someones name in an honest way, however in doing so I wasn't building this person up, rather placing them in a dark light if you may.

My teenager turned to me and said "you don't need to say that, it isn't really necessary!" Then he explained that instead of mentioning that name in the manner I had used, I could just mention the incident. Nobody needs to know how the incident took place.

Thinking about what he had said I realized that even though I was stating things how they really did happen, it was unnecessary for me to mention the how. If I were the How I would hope people could look past me, maybe not even notice my involvement. Even if I was in the wrong. I don't have this perfected. I just had the lesson today. It gives me something else I can work on.

"And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them." -Ether 12:27

From past experiences Heavenly Father uses us, and others to be his instruments. It continuously amazes me how often children seem to be his finer teachers. Could it be because they are who parents are closer to? Or that they are fresher from his presence? Something to ponder.

Life's Rose Garden

While listening to others testimonies today I was impressed by the thought that Heavenly Father really, truly does love us! He is so aware of us as individuals in fact, it amazes me at times. I have at times thought maybe he had forgot about me, or somehow I had been placed on the back burner. Honestly I thought that if He was aware of me I wouldn't be feeling the pain I am at a particular moment.

There are so many stories in the scriptures of people, everyday people like myself, trying to rely on themselves and finding they could only get further up the path if they trusted in the Savior. Take for example the woman that had the issue of blood. She suffered for many years. Finally one day she heard of a Man who performed miracles. She went right way up to Him and merely touched His robe.

Imagine how she may have felt the moment He stopped and asked who had touched Him. If it was me I may have wanted to withdraw into the crowd. Instead she stood forth and admitted it was she. In doing so she was able to receive the confirmation through Him of her worthiness of the gift. She was healed.

There is also the story of Peter, and the other apostles on the boat. They see Christ walking towards them on the water. Peter was the only one with faith enough to attempt walking out to meet the Savior. When he did I am sure the first steps were taken with confidence. Then I imagine he may have thought to himself "hey, I'm not the Savior, what am I thinking" and with that he began to sink. Instead of sinking to his death however he turned to the Savior and reached for his hand. Christ took his hand and together they joined the other apostles.

When Peter turned to the Savior I think he was speaking to me through his actions. He knew Christ wouldn't let him down. He had the privilege of knowing Christ in person. He knew that the savior would save him.

There are so many times I think I have to do things on my own. Don't get me wrong, I believe there are some things we do have to do on our own. Take the first step for one, or reaching for His garment. After we show our faith by taking that first step though, He is not far from us ready to catch us if we stumble or fall. He has his hand outstretched.

There are times I imagine there is no possible way he can help me, maybe I have gone too far, said too many things. Or maybe I feel I have let the natural man totally take over. it is in those times I am reminded of a favorite scripture. D&C 6:36. In this scripture the Savior is talking to Oliver Cowdry, but also to me. He said "Look unto me in every thought, doubt not, fear not."

If I look unto Christ even when I feel like he has forgotten me I realize He hasn't. Usually when it hurts it is an opportunity for me to grow. With growth there seems to come pain, but if I remind myself that He truly and honestly has my best at heart. Sometimes that makes it easier for me to ask for help to get up, brush myself off and continue along the path He has marked for me. I find that many stones I think of as stumbling stones can actually with His help be turned to stepping stones.

Many times I look back, and don't even remember the pain I experienced in the moment of growth. A dear friend once told me during a struggle "Life is like a bed of roses, Before you entered it all you saw were the beautiful roses. As you go through life you are going to find there are thorns in that garden, they will tear at your flesh, your cloths, hair, what ever they can. In the end though, you will look back and only see the flowers, but with a knowledge that to enjoy their beauty you had to experience a few thorns."

Life's Little Lessons on venting

My lessons seem to be taught in a painful manner at times. I've been told that pain can mean growth, however I wouldn't mind entirely going around the growing pains. I could do without them. But here is the latest little lesson.

Venting I hear is good. I do it often enough that I hope no one takes this personal, like I said this is a lesson I am learning. I am finding however that venting can have some awfully painful comebacks. There are two of these returns that I would like to talk about.

Let me set this up with person A, person B, and person C. A, being the venter, B being the listener, and C being the offender. This will simplify what I am trying to express.

First. When person A vents to person B, involved or not, no matter how unbiased they say they can be, person A's words will affect the way "B" will view person C. Whether "B" the listener knows of "C", person A is paining a picture. So even if person B never meets the person C, person "A" has developed a picture for "B". It is only natural then to make judgments off that painting later.

Second. After person "A" is done venting person B may at times think they are doing a favor for both "A" and "C" if they intervene and explain for "A" to "C" what has been vented about. This can be a problem because since the "A" was just venting at the time, they may be way over it later. Then "C" finds out that they have made an offense that possibly they had absolutely no intentions of making, nor clue that it would have been taken as such.

With "B"'s good intentions only comes more hurt feelings. Feelings that "C" needed not to experience, and possibly "A" had not intended to be forwarded so to say. Also, Person "A" may have wanted to confront it them selves, and felt that venting would possibly help them to put it into perspective. Or that "B" may have some suggestions themselves on how to take what was taken.

See there are so many variables to this and I am still learning them. Life's lessons hurt at times. It stinks. But like I have been told, Pain means growth right? I have played all three of these roles as have each of us, its a cycle and it still stinks.