I have had all of these thoughts go through my head at one time or another. I love being a mother! I love watching my children grow like weeds and experiencing each new day.
However, I have moments when I think It would be nice to work out side of the home. There are so many "benefits". I think I could have extra money. People would recognize my accomplishments. My productivity would be higher. Talking to adults would be something that took a majority of my time, jibberish would be part time. Some one else could do the potty training, I would just do follow up. My house would be cleaner, cause no one would be there to mess it up.
Then after letting these thoughts roll around on the brain I realize there would be many things I would miss, they would pass me by. For example I might miss my children's firsts. Someone else would be there to wipe tears when they fall down and skin their knee. I would miss their coming home from school and telling me about their day, the good or bad. They would be raised with someone else's expectations, values, principles, maybe even morals. They might turn to someone else when they are hurt. I would miss out on many of the little things they say in innocence. I would miss hearing them play with each other, laughing at each other, even if it is out of mischievousness. There is so many things I would miss. Numbering them would be impossible.
I have come to the conclusion in all of this thinking, that I am lucky to be home with my little ones. There are many out there who would love the chance and for one reason or other aren't able.
Don't get me wrong, many times a day I catch myself praying for patience, confort, creativity, patience again, words, a sense of humor, patience, knowledge, understanding, a blind eye, patience....I think you get the idea. I pray for these and many other blessings in my day to day. That is how I do it. I am not always perfect, in fact often I fall quite short. But, I do find comfort in the tought that there are others experiencing this season of life the same as I.
These are just a few of my thoughs as of late. Did I mention that I have to pray for patience?
Showing posts with label Motherhood. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Motherhood. Show all posts
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Monday, August 3, 2009
Mom 101
Not seriously, but let me tell you. having two little ones with minds of their own and them all to myself with daddy away...*sigh*, I can hardly wait for his return!
Honestly the feelings today were something to experience: "What, another plate of food on the floor?!" "It's no wonder you are hungry, you your food is all on the floor rather than in your stomach." "Why are you pouring milk on the floor like that? cows don't grow out of the floor boards." "No, spaghetti sauce is not the new rave in the lotion department, why is it all over your arms and legs like that?" "Princesses do not flick their food all over the kitchen like that!" "You know, you were in front of the toilet...why is there a puddle under you? You can't pee like your brothers." "The trash stays in the trash can, we don't need this kind of remodeling done." "You didn't need help making the mess...." *sigh* oh, I could go on. I feel like I have got nothing accomplished to day. Only ranting and raving.
Honestly the feelings today were something to experience: "What, another plate of food on the floor?!" "It's no wonder you are hungry, you your food is all on the floor rather than in your stomach." "Why are you pouring milk on the floor like that? cows don't grow out of the floor boards." "No, spaghetti sauce is not the new rave in the lotion department, why is it all over your arms and legs like that?" "Princesses do not flick their food all over the kitchen like that!" "You know, you were in front of the toilet...why is there a puddle under you? You can't pee like your brothers." "The trash stays in the trash can, we don't need this kind of remodeling done." "You didn't need help making the mess...." *sigh* oh, I could go on. I feel like I have got nothing accomplished to day. Only ranting and raving.
Friday, April 24, 2009
Humility 101
Well, if it wasn't clear to me before, it certainly is now. You may be wondering what I am talking about, well let me share.
I have been feeling a bit frumpy as I am sure most mothers do at one point or another. I am thirty pounds more than when I began having children, and my clothes no longer fit the way they should. In fact they fit but only in places the shouldn't. This became clear while dressing my two-year-old.
While on the floor with her and helping her with her shoes she pointed to my belly and said in the sweetest voice:
"Mommy, you look like a snowman!"
Now you would think I would know better than ask questions, but you will see that was my great mistake.
"Why do you think I look like a snowman?"
Pointing to the bottom roll and working her way up she sweetly says:
"There is the snowman belly, (second roll) there is his chest, and there is its two heads!"
All I can say to that is yikes! It sure is good to have the innocents of a young child around to keep you humble isn't it.
I have been feeling a bit frumpy as I am sure most mothers do at one point or another. I am thirty pounds more than when I began having children, and my clothes no longer fit the way they should. In fact they fit but only in places the shouldn't. This became clear while dressing my two-year-old.
While on the floor with her and helping her with her shoes she pointed to my belly and said in the sweetest voice:
"Mommy, you look like a snowman!"
Now you would think I would know better than ask questions, but you will see that was my great mistake.
"Why do you think I look like a snowman?"
Pointing to the bottom roll and working her way up she sweetly says:
"There is the snowman belly, (second roll) there is his chest, and there is its two heads!"
All I can say to that is yikes! It sure is good to have the innocents of a young child around to keep you humble isn't it.
Sunday, February 22, 2009
Potty Training 101
Well, we are in potty training mode full swing! My little one is growing up!
I am glad I have a two year old and a 9 mo. old. It is giving me the "I can get through this" perspective. Let me explain.
I watch my 9 mo. old and realize that before I know it he is going to rely on me a lot less. I know this because sister is quite self sufficient at things. I look at the different phases and understand that she has also passed through them and I survived. Through this I can look at her and see how far she has come so quickly. I can have hope...almost faith that 2-3 mos. from now she won't be wetting her pants any more, or having fear that her "stinkies" will feel disowned if she lets them go in the toilet rather than her pants.
These are my hopes and dreams for the near future. It is funny how children change our aspirations.
I am glad I have a two year old and a 9 mo. old. It is giving me the "I can get through this" perspective. Let me explain.
I watch my 9 mo. old and realize that before I know it he is going to rely on me a lot less. I know this because sister is quite self sufficient at things. I look at the different phases and understand that she has also passed through them and I survived. Through this I can look at her and see how far she has come so quickly. I can have hope...almost faith that 2-3 mos. from now she won't be wetting her pants any more, or having fear that her "stinkies" will feel disowned if she lets them go in the toilet rather than her pants.
These are my hopes and dreams for the near future. It is funny how children change our aspirations.
Thursday, February 19, 2009
Valued Lesson
Today I was talking with my teenager. He is going to be a famous author someday. We were talking about the importance of backing things up and saving them in more than one place. In this conversation I used myself and his mother as examples. Through my personal example I mentioned someones name in an honest way, however in doing so I wasn't building this person up, rather placing them in a dark light if you may.
My teenager turned to me and said "you don't need to say that, it isn't really necessary!" Then he explained that instead of mentioning that name in the manner I had used, I could just mention the incident. Nobody needs to know how the incident took place.
Thinking about what he had said I realized that even though I was stating things how they really did happen, it was unnecessary for me to mention the how. If I were the How I would hope people could look past me, maybe not even notice my involvement. Even if I was in the wrong. I don't have this perfected. I just had the lesson today. It gives me something else I can work on.
"And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them." -Ether 12:27
From past experiences Heavenly Father uses us, and others to be his instruments. It continuously amazes me how often children seem to be his finer teachers. Could it be because they are who parents are closer to? Or that they are fresher from his presence? Something to ponder.
My teenager turned to me and said "you don't need to say that, it isn't really necessary!" Then he explained that instead of mentioning that name in the manner I had used, I could just mention the incident. Nobody needs to know how the incident took place.
Thinking about what he had said I realized that even though I was stating things how they really did happen, it was unnecessary for me to mention the how. If I were the How I would hope people could look past me, maybe not even notice my involvement. Even if I was in the wrong. I don't have this perfected. I just had the lesson today. It gives me something else I can work on.
"And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them." -Ether 12:27
From past experiences Heavenly Father uses us, and others to be his instruments. It continuously amazes me how often children seem to be his finer teachers. Could it be because they are who parents are closer to? Or that they are fresher from his presence? Something to ponder.
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Resolutions
It has been a good week. A busy one and fun at the same time. As of late I have been trying to come up with some more exciting ways to entertain my little ones during the day. It seems a bit to easy these days to turn them over to the tube, then get my things done. I justified it because my daughter is learning about numbers, shapes, letters, and all of those good things as she watches say: Mickey Mouse Club House, Super Why, Word World. She is even learning a bit about people skills while watching things like: Miss Spider and Sunny Patch Friends, Oswald...there is a list I don't want to brag about, it's to long for a Two year old.
So I have come up with a few ideas.
I think I am going to do more crafts, she is a little artist, (there is proof of it all the way down my hall, and next to the piano.) We could cook together once in a while. Baking cookies, or my two year old's favorite, cupcakes! (I have to admit this one is hard for me, I work better as one in the kitchen.)
On nice sunny days I am going to do more outside activities(this is for me just as much as for my children) maybe going to the park, going on walks or simply playing in the yard.
Our local Library I am finding is a treasure trove for activities! They have things for all ages. Story Time, a family movie once a month. I am sure they have more, these are the ones I have only heard about.
My latest discovery is one I thought was out of reach. I found, to get a year round pass for my family at the Children's Museum isn't all that expensive. This would be a great rainy day activity, not only that, but the membership extends to out of state as well, so when we travel we would be able to have a free activity pretty much anywhere. Well except Battlemountain NV. I think it might be a bit too small.
And finally there is the one thing that I think is easiest to forget or simply put aside for another time, that is to get involved a bit more in their play. Most kids are content having you watch. I need to take time to sit down and read more, or play with my little munchkins, after all they aren't going to be little forever.
So I have come up with a few ideas.
I think I am going to do more crafts, she is a little artist, (there is proof of it all the way down my hall, and next to the piano.) We could cook together once in a while. Baking cookies, or my two year old's favorite, cupcakes! (I have to admit this one is hard for me, I work better as one in the kitchen.)
On nice sunny days I am going to do more outside activities(this is for me just as much as for my children) maybe going to the park, going on walks or simply playing in the yard.
Our local Library I am finding is a treasure trove for activities! They have things for all ages. Story Time, a family movie once a month. I am sure they have more, these are the ones I have only heard about.
My latest discovery is one I thought was out of reach. I found, to get a year round pass for my family at the Children's Museum isn't all that expensive. This would be a great rainy day activity, not only that, but the membership extends to out of state as well, so when we travel we would be able to have a free activity pretty much anywhere. Well except Battlemountain NV. I think it might be a bit too small.
And finally there is the one thing that I think is easiest to forget or simply put aside for another time, that is to get involved a bit more in their play. Most kids are content having you watch. I need to take time to sit down and read more, or play with my little munchkins, after all they aren't going to be little forever.
Sunday, January 25, 2009
Motherhood is a One-Time Deal
Tonight as I tucked my precious little children into bed I reminisced. First, of things not too far behind me. I was remembering a night a couple months ago. The baby was tired, but fought sleep until I thought it may have eluded us both. Finally with what felt like a possible eternity, he did fall a sleep. After tucking him in and returning to my bed, I found that sleep was not far from me after all.
It felt like only a moment after my head had hit the pillow, that my two year old awoke crying. I remember thinking "haven't I put in my time for today? I am so tired!" I then continued to lay in bed for a couple of moments hoping, almost praying that she would go back to sleep. She didn't. I arose to the a expectations I had willingly raised her to have. Dragging my 'weary' bones out of bed I went in and consoled her.
Succeeding this thought, my reminiscing went further back. I was three or four years of age. I was feeling total excitement because we had just got bunk beds! With being the oldest I pulled rank and had called dibs on the top bunk for myself. To say I was pleased would be a bit of an understatement. My sister seemed almost relieved that it wasn't hers, thus making it an all around a good situation. So I thought. Later I found that having the top bunk wasn't all that it'd been cracked up to be.
You know those dreams where you feel yourself falling and you just know you are going to die? Well, I remember having that dream and waking up with my face crammed into the air vent on my floor. I also remember my mother pulling me up into her arms before I had a chance to pick myself up. In this memory there was a bloody nose and my guilt of getting it on my mother's night gown. Along with that there is also the memory of her telling me everything would be OK, and not to be silly, her nightie would wash. When the tears had been wiped away, dried, hugs given and the bloody nose stopped my mother tucked me back in bed. She moved the protection bar to the head of my bed and I fell back in to a reasonably sound sleep.
My final thought of this process tonight was on my own attitude vs. my mothers attitude. My mother was there the moment she heard my cry. I don't remember how late it was or if my brother had come along yet. I can however, be sure that she was most likely tired herself.
In the day to day, I hope that I don't forget the fact that I have only one chance at being a mom. I won't get everything perfect every time. However in all my desires the greatest one is that my children know they are loved and first (next to their Father ) in my day to day.
Lately I have been finding myself thinking how great it would be to accomplishing all of these great things. You know, learn photography, crochet an afghan, scrap a scrapbook...the list is endless! All of these things would be left behind to show I lived right? But is this really the season for me to do all of those things?
In order to do so I would have to put my children on the back burner. I only have them for a short time! Before I know it they will be off to school, being influenced by others. Now is my time to instill in them values and a foundation to build their own testimonies on. It all seems so overwhelming when I think about it really. Then I am reminded, I have to take life only a day at a time. When that feels overwhelming, well, a moment at a time works just as well.
It felt like only a moment after my head had hit the pillow, that my two year old awoke crying. I remember thinking "haven't I put in my time for today? I am so tired!" I then continued to lay in bed for a couple of moments hoping, almost praying that she would go back to sleep. She didn't. I arose to the a expectations I had willingly raised her to have. Dragging my 'weary' bones out of bed I went in and consoled her.
Succeeding this thought, my reminiscing went further back. I was three or four years of age. I was feeling total excitement because we had just got bunk beds! With being the oldest I pulled rank and had called dibs on the top bunk for myself. To say I was pleased would be a bit of an understatement. My sister seemed almost relieved that it wasn't hers, thus making it an all around a good situation. So I thought. Later I found that having the top bunk wasn't all that it'd been cracked up to be.
You know those dreams where you feel yourself falling and you just know you are going to die? Well, I remember having that dream and waking up with my face crammed into the air vent on my floor. I also remember my mother pulling me up into her arms before I had a chance to pick myself up. In this memory there was a bloody nose and my guilt of getting it on my mother's night gown. Along with that there is also the memory of her telling me everything would be OK, and not to be silly, her nightie would wash. When the tears had been wiped away, dried, hugs given and the bloody nose stopped my mother tucked me back in bed. She moved the protection bar to the head of my bed and I fell back in to a reasonably sound sleep.
My final thought of this process tonight was on my own attitude vs. my mothers attitude. My mother was there the moment she heard my cry. I don't remember how late it was or if my brother had come along yet. I can however, be sure that she was most likely tired herself.
In the day to day, I hope that I don't forget the fact that I have only one chance at being a mom. I won't get everything perfect every time. However in all my desires the greatest one is that my children know they are loved and first (next to their Father ) in my day to day.
Lately I have been finding myself thinking how great it would be to accomplishing all of these great things. You know, learn photography, crochet an afghan, scrap a scrapbook...the list is endless! All of these things would be left behind to show I lived right? But is this really the season for me to do all of those things?
In order to do so I would have to put my children on the back burner. I only have them for a short time! Before I know it they will be off to school, being influenced by others. Now is my time to instill in them values and a foundation to build their own testimonies on. It all seems so overwhelming when I think about it really. Then I am reminded, I have to take life only a day at a time. When that feels overwhelming, well, a moment at a time works just as well.
Friday, November 14, 2008
Why don't the books tell you how it really is?
I am at that point in life where I am trying to learn balance. As a stay at home mother I am able to protect my children from quite a bit. However, trying to fit in rec time for them and myself is where I am finding it difficult to balance.
When we stay home I am only able to get everything done I need to with the assistance of the telly as my baby-setter and missing baths or not doing hair. Everyone tells me this is just a season and it will pass. Then there is the part where I feel like my children need time for socializing, let alone myself.
My socializing seems to consist of church meetings mainly. This isn't a complaint. However I have been attempting to expand my social realm. The effect of this expansion is that my children have difficulties adjusting. With that I myself am feeling a bit overwhelmed. I have dear friends who have told me if I need a change of scenery I am welcome to use them for that purpose. But when do I fit them in too?
So here is my thing. I am trying to fit in Story-time at the Library. Also I have joined a gym for free because I help with others children once a week, thus my children get to interact with other children and have other toys than their own. I have my presidency meeting I look forward to on Fridays, again interaction with other children. Plus I would like to fit in Enrichment for stay at home mom's, the kids play and we visit. All sounds good right?
I want to do all of these things, yet when I get only half of them done, that is all I get done because I am too tired to do anything else, or my children are. I was so excited about the gym thing but am only able to take advantage of it once a week. Not really doing me any good then. Then there is the Enrichment thing, My children have been napping during it the past two weeks. By time they are awake it is time for me to pick up my youngster from school.
When they said there is no rest for the wicked, I really had no idea that I was considered that wicked. Part of this stems from me reading an amazing book series. however when I was young I seem to see me doing many more things at one time and not feeling quite as overwhelmed as I have lately.
Part of this is scheduling things which is another thing I am finding difficult. With older children at home the younger ones don't want to go to bed and miss things. But the following morning we all have a hard time getting ourselves started. When it was just my 2 yr old and I, I was able to bathe her every other day, do her hair everyday and keep up on laundry, dishes and other things, namely projects. How did I do it all? Oh how I admire all of those mothers who have survived this season of their lives! I hope down the road I can be one of those as well. That I have done it with a bit of grace and still have my dignity (or shall I say sanity.)
When we stay home I am only able to get everything done I need to with the assistance of the telly as my baby-setter and missing baths or not doing hair. Everyone tells me this is just a season and it will pass. Then there is the part where I feel like my children need time for socializing, let alone myself.
My socializing seems to consist of church meetings mainly. This isn't a complaint. However I have been attempting to expand my social realm. The effect of this expansion is that my children have difficulties adjusting. With that I myself am feeling a bit overwhelmed. I have dear friends who have told me if I need a change of scenery I am welcome to use them for that purpose. But when do I fit them in too?
So here is my thing. I am trying to fit in Story-time at the Library. Also I have joined a gym for free because I help with others children once a week, thus my children get to interact with other children and have other toys than their own. I have my presidency meeting I look forward to on Fridays, again interaction with other children. Plus I would like to fit in Enrichment for stay at home mom's, the kids play and we visit. All sounds good right?
I want to do all of these things, yet when I get only half of them done, that is all I get done because I am too tired to do anything else, or my children are. I was so excited about the gym thing but am only able to take advantage of it once a week. Not really doing me any good then. Then there is the Enrichment thing, My children have been napping during it the past two weeks. By time they are awake it is time for me to pick up my youngster from school.
When they said there is no rest for the wicked, I really had no idea that I was considered that wicked. Part of this stems from me reading an amazing book series. however when I was young I seem to see me doing many more things at one time and not feeling quite as overwhelmed as I have lately.
Part of this is scheduling things which is another thing I am finding difficult. With older children at home the younger ones don't want to go to bed and miss things. But the following morning we all have a hard time getting ourselves started. When it was just my 2 yr old and I, I was able to bathe her every other day, do her hair everyday and keep up on laundry, dishes and other things, namely projects. How did I do it all? Oh how I admire all of those mothers who have survived this season of their lives! I hope down the road I can be one of those as well. That I have done it with a bit of grace and still have my dignity (or shall I say sanity.)
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